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Drop Dead Intelligence: Your Bartender's Secret Ingredient

2/19/2019

1 Comment

 
We have this totally skewed definition of flirting - that it somehow involves only a sexual or romantic interaction with a definitive physical outcome. ​That kind of thinking just limits the endless possibilities of your human interactions.
Flirting: a playful or coy behavior generally intended to gain the attraction of the recipient whether with serious intentions or for simple amusement; cheeky behavior
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If you've ever worked near me, you know I highly encourage/value flirting. I'd argue any day that flirting is just as important as ambiance, polished glassware, and possibly even proper garnish (but that's a different blog about foreplay).  

When I bring this up I inevitably get an upturned eyebrow from at least one rigid, rule-bound person.
​And I say: "You can flirt with anyone." 
I contend: "It doesn't have to be sexual."
​I persist: "Last week I flirted with a baby at Target."
More eyebrows do eyebrow acrobatics. 
Lately, I feel like I'm not flirting with my friends, my loved ones, my coworkers anymore. It's like we just delve into the serious stuff, or even worse, the mundane stuff. We get comfortable, or even worse, uncomfortable with people and so we omit the cute smile at the end of the sentence that can turn a statement from a boring demand to a mysterious question. ​I demand more mysterious questions.
More eyebrows do more eyebrow acrobatics...
And even right now, as I type, I feel a little like Carrie Bradshaw (crazy hair, weird outfit, staring out the window), who by all means could be considered one of my generation's greatest flirts with her curling smile, infectious laugh, surprising squeal, and awkward but intentional hair twirl. I'm not sure my sequins shorts and baseball jersey paired with fuzzy slippers rivals a "Carrie" "OOTD" but I sure do feel feisty with my keyboard right now. 
"But what does this have to do with cocktails, Betty?" Not much as a whole, but, if you think of your favorite bartenders, you will notice they are always flirting; not just with guests, but with the other bartenders, the barback, the servers, and anyone they can get their eyes on. Skilled flirting is drop. dead. intelligent. 
I am implore you, Universe; play coy already! Drop your shoulder into a conversation at the barstool next to you. Wink from the corner of your eye when your friend asks if you should have one more happy hour cocktail. Twirl your hair when your cute bartender asks if he can buy you a shot.  It'll do wonders for your blood pressure, and hopefully, wreak havoc on the blood pressure of those around you (in a good way).
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    A Betty (by a broad definition) is honest and brave, loyal and nurturing, witty and fun. She's balanced, quirky, open-minded, complex, and flawed. She's soulful and driven. And I think there's a little Betty in all of us. 
    Someone once said "Who the hell is Chris Henley!?" Well, that's me. I'm Chris Henley. Therapist. Concoctionist. Humanitarian. Perpetual Optimist. Dog Lover. Cocktail Enthusiast. I'm a bit of a Jane-of-All-Trades with an affinity for creativity in the kitchen and a fascination with understanding people. I once made a girl a drink "that tastes like tennis" and my favorite bartenders have never met a stranger. I'm awed by people who can do things I can't and I know more dogs in my neighborhood than I do humans. Speaking of my neighborhood, if you catch me on my stoop I will invite you in for fresh baked goods or a dangerous cocktail.

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